New Chapter
So its been a while...
I don't even know where to start. Im not sure if im the only one in this world trying to find themselves. But i have been busy trying to be more positive and find out who i really am. In this whole process a lot has happened. I moved from Cologne to Stuttgart, made new friends and have a new Job. A lot has changed... it was possible for me to escape from my past. Away from the attacks, the brutality, the drugs and bad relationships. I went through a lot in Cologne and it was just time to have a change of scenery.
Even though I feel much better in Stuttgart. New City, New People, New Goals... you still have Flashbacks. You start asking yourself .. was that all real ? Or was I dreaming that ? Or can i just forget and pretend it never happened? You start to lie awake at night asking yourself so many questions. All unanswered. I don't know if other women also have this problem... or if im the only one. I struggled real bad and now everything is over and im fine. Its so surreal because i actually fought through and made it. But my mind doesn't want to end that Chapter. I guess old Habits don't die ?
So i talked about my attack a while back ... and i found out some disturbing information. So in Germany as a Police Man you learn in school that every third Rape is a fake. So automatically they think you are not telling the truth. They think YOU are that third person. Your not taken seriously and feel like a lunatic. I mean i never saw it that way.. that women would lie about something so horrible. But I guess there are those kind of people. Its just sad that women that actually do get raped won't be taken seriously. Why... it gives me chills everytime i think about it. Oh well ... the school material won't be changing soon so i guess its something we just have to live with ??
Through all of this Hell of Thoughts I've learned to keep a smile on my face. I keep going. I try to see everything in a positive way. The Glass is always ALWAYS half full. I empower myself with meditations and new goals for myself. I try to be the best Version of myself. I think if everybody starts doing that... then the World would be a much nicer Place. So stay positive, stay true to yourself... a lot of Bullshit will come and go in your life but don't lose yourself in it. I know its hard.. but If i can do it... so can anybody. Thats all I have to say :)
P.S. Don't mind the Cats in the Background of the Picture Haha They looove the attention.
Xoxo
Amyknowsbest
It's horrible that the police could say or think that, and it's also completely untrue. Research has shown that sexual assault is no more falsely reported than any other crime. People are no more likely to falsely report an assault than they are to falsely report having their car stolen. I will link an interesting article about it (https://www.nsvrc.org/sites/default/files/Publications_NSVRC_Overview_False-Reporting.pdf). The idea that women falsely accuse of rape is exaggerated, we live in a society that would rather tell women they are liars than make people who commit assault face their justice. It's very sad. Every woman who says they have been raped deserves to be taken seriously because it is such a small percentage of women who lie about it.Netflix also has a really interesting documentary about sexual assault (called The Hunting Ground.)
AntwortenLöschenBeing the victim of such a crime is terrifying. You feel like it was your fault or you could have done something to prevent it, even though it wasn't. Then the police make you feel as though it was your fault too or that you are a liar. I know from personal experience how hard it can be to be a survivor of such things. Even though it's good to stay positive, there are bad days when you might not act your best, and that's okay too.
You positivist is really admirable, it is easy to feel hopeless about things when you are in a difficult position and when you are moving past a large trauma. I think many women who have been attacked feel the way you do and it's really normal. Unfortunately it isn't something that can just be moved past, I think you have to work really hard on healing yourself. It's so hard and it hurts my heart that you have to go through that.
I really enjoy your blog and I am happy you are doing well :)
Thank you so much for your Feedback. I really do appreciate it. And I do the writing for me... because it does help me somehow get through it. But yes it is truly horrible. I had a chat with a German Police Man and he told me that is what they learn in school. So yeah pretty sad... Thank you again for your Feedback !! :)
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